DScottGRRL

Something very very wrong has transpired in the last few weeks. Something has sent my equilibrium way off kilter and kicked my dreamer gene into high gear.

Absurd instances of absentmindedness abound.

In the past four weeks I have managed to:

1. run a red light and get a $400 ticket (I don’t remember doing this but apparently there was photographic evidence)
2. drive into a puddle of cement–now i have cement splashes all over my hood (I know, WTF, right?… but I don’t remember doing this either…)
3. almost leave my wallet at the sushi restaurant (kind-hearted waiter)*
4. lose my favorite shawl (dropped it at the airport)
5. lose my favorite jacket (sneaking suspicion I dropped it somewhere)
6. scrape my side view mirror trying to park too close to the column (I have a sordid history with columns–they like to jump out and hit my rear bumpers)
7. forget my phone in the car 14 times
8. break my phone’s charger receptor
9. change and subsequently lose my password to my phone and computer discounts
10. go way over my Quicken budget in just about every category (meanwhile meticulously checking my balances daily)
11. watch three scary movies when I’m going to be spending the entire week by my lonesome

Yes, I am spending the week alone. Hell, I am travelling alone for five days.

Now, given my current state, is that a good idea? I’m having doubts.

I’ve already prepared my bags, tickets, business paperwork, etc, in the hope that planning ahead will mitigate my (inevitable) blundering blunders on travel day (4 days from now).

Losing my jacket was really the last straw… I was rather attached to it… (see it in the above photosnap? it has puffed sleeves. isn’t it preeeetty?)

Has anyone seen my marbles?

They can be quite useful to me at times so please return them.

I think I need someone to patronize me and tell me I am not alone right now…

Or that I am so superduperfrickin’special that I don’t ever need to worry about these silly banal details of life ever again…

*this was an eyeopening experience. So I’m leaving the restaurant, do a quick mental checklist to see if I’m leaving anything, pleased as punch I remembered to pick up my jacket and I’m off. Five minutes later while waiting for the valet the waiter runs out holding my wallet.me: Oh, Oh, yeah. Thank you so much.random friend of a friend of a friend (female) we were with: How could you forget your wallet (incredulous, accusatory tone)

me: uhhh. it happens. (inner bristling)

think to myself: Clearly she does not get the essence of me (mildly offended)

I mean seriously, is it that odd for someone to forget their shit someplace? Definitely not in my world. Not in my family, at least…