DScottGRRL

“…There’s certain things that black people are the best at and certain things that white people are the best at. Whatever we as black people are the best at, I’m a go get that. Like, on Christmas I don’t want any food that tastes white. And when I go to purchase a house, I don’t want my credit to look black.”

- Kanye West in the new issue of Spin

Better? That’s it. I’m a go name my kid Kanye. More Kanye posts here and here.

Technorati Tags: Kanye West, quotes, Spin

it had been so long, I had actually stopped thinking about it

it was no longer a part of my daily life

for some reason i chalked it up to one of those east coast/ west coast things

or maybe i just live in a better area now

whatever i didnt really give it any deep thought

so i’m walking from my car to get the mail and…

hark! what do i hear?

pssssssssssssst

pssssssssssssst

pssssssssssssst

what could that be? it must be someone i know, you know, because that shit doesnt happen to me here, right?

pssssssssssssst

pssssssssssssst

followed by lipsmacking and rude gestures from an effing imbecile on a bike

he disturbed my peace

i was pisssssssssssssssed

so what do you do?

here’s what i did–i so eloquently squawked at him in the middle of the street (like the lady that i am): YOU ARE DISGUSTING

squawked

what do they call it?

l’esprit de l’escalier

couldn’t I have come better than that?

i could have used “despicable.” at least that would have been a little more creative. heck, “filthy” would have been at least a little more clever. marginally.

PISSED

i should have just let it go. if you don’t acknowledge it, it doesn’t exist.

then i wouldn’t be obsessing right now about my failure to use my words.

i’ve never been that good on-the-spot. especially with insults. it’s generally in print that i shine. maybe i should write him a caustic letter.

long, deep cleansing breaths. goosfraba. the universe is unfolding as it should. accept that some people are not worth your thoughts and move on.

peace.

“People are always like, ‘We like his music, but we don’t like him.’ And I’m like, ‘Well, duh, I get to edit my music.”~ Kanye West in an ABC News article

alas! if only I could edit my life…

Technorati Tags: Kanye West, editing

The farther I get physically from my family, the stronger my need to be a part of it; the undeniable need to connect.

People talk about the happy quiet that can exist between two lovers, but this was too great; sitting between his sister and his brother, saying nothing, eating. Before the world existed, before it was populated, and before there were wars and colleges and movies and clothes and opinions and foreign travel—before all of these things there had been only one person, Zora, and only one place: a tent in the living room made from chairs and bed-sheets. After a few years, Levi arrived; space was made for him it was as if he had always been.

Looking at them both now, Jerome found himself in their finger joints and neat conch ears, in their long legs and wild curls. He heard himself in their partial lisps caused by puffy tongues vibrating against slighlty noticeable buckteeth. He did not consider if or how or why he loved them. They were just love: they were the first evidence he ever had of love, and they would be the last confirmation of love when everything else fell away.

~ Zadie Smith, On Beauty.

There’s something so delicious about re-reading one of your favourite books and finding new passages that excite you by their ability to get it so unbelievably right.

It’s summer. I do a lot of re-reading in the summer. In less than a week I’ll have some really heavy reading to contend with so I’m hanging on to these few precious moments of do-nothingness I have left (decadence!).

So… on siblings.

The instance of the above passage is when a sister and two brothers fortuitously bounce into each other at a bus-stop in Boston. Entirely unplanned and ridiculously serendipitous.

Once we grew up and moved out, my dad would always get a kick out of that the three of us being together, wherever we were, even if he and mums weren’t there. I didn’t get it then. I do now.

It’s funny, the less I see of them–and now that I’m in LA it’s considerably less–the more I’m amazed by the wall of love I run into whenever we’re together.

To paraphrase, I most definitely do not consider the if or how or why of loving my brothers. But it is absolute and unfailing and… so comforting. And now that they’re having kids, I can feel it in the wall of love that hits me (no words) to be in the presence of these newest blood members. A love like they were always there. I’m botching it up. She said it better:

They were just love: they were the first evidence he ever had of love, and they would be the last confirmation of love when everything else fell away.

How comforting not to need words (and the three of us all have a bit of the over-explainer in us), to know that words are superfluous to the flow of understanding that comes from a shared history.

I think I’m going to extend this to my cousins. By virtue of our age gaps, I spent as much time with my eleventy first cousins (four in particular) as I did with my brothers. We’re not as close as we used to be, which makes me kind of sad.

But it still hits me so profoundly to be with them, to know that in the deepest, most true sense that they understand it all, that they “get it.”

To feel the pull of blood.

Technorati Tags: zadie smith, on beauty, siblings, brothers, cousins, blood, family, love, reading

I know, I know, a controversial topic.

Whatever.

There are a lot of things about the church and religion in general that irk me, and for the most part I choose not to discuss them because well, people will believe what they want to believe, and I don’t know that there’s a really good defense to, “It’s what I believe, so there.”

It’s like me and cats.

I believe that cats possess mystical, unearthly powers and that if I lock eyes with them bad, unspeakable things will happen to me.

They might possess my soul.

They are evil, malicious creatures capable of committing terrible acts and I am paralyzed with fear when one so much as comes within my line of sight.

It’s what I believe.

So there.

You see? 100% irrefutable.

__________ Read the rest of this entry »

i present to you my favorite poem.

i keep a copy on my wall, in my wallet. i’m always shoving it on my friends who tend not to pay me any mind.

a little new-agey but i can be like that sometimes.

probably the only thing that would make it better is all commons (lower-case). i’m currently anti-caps but still pro-punctuation.

i don’t refer to it as much as i should but anyway, i’m in a good mood so it’s working.

yes, indeed. no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Desiderata

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Max Ehrmann, Desiderata, Copyright 1952.

Technorati Tags: desiderata, max ehrmann, universe, favorite poem

ameliorate

a·mel·io·rate /əˈmilyəˌreɪt, əˈmiliə-/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[uh-meel-yuh-reyt, uh-mee-lee-uh-]

–verb (used with object), verb (used without object), -rat·ed, -rat·ing.

to make or become better, more bearable, or more satisfactory; improve; meliorate.

Why? Because I spent the entire day (on and off) trying to remember if it meant to improve or worsen. It happens sometimes.

I heart dictionary.com

“It’s a signal that you are on the cutting edge if you feel like you’re experiencing early onset Alzheimer’s”*

~ Jennifer James, PhD

The Adaptive Executive

IABC Conference, New Orleans, June 26, 2007

Take that, blundering blunders.

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“The chairman of the state board of medical examiners was a physician who thought that President Teddy Roosevelt was the only other man in the world besides himself who had not been made from a banana.”

~John Irving, The Cider House Rules.

I just started reading it. So far I like. I like John Irving.