DScottGRRL

Hi. Still here. Been thinking alot. Creating posts in my head. Never really managing to get them on paper. A self-imposed writer’s block. No fault but mine.

So I’ve been thinking lately. I’m thinking it’s time for me to abandon this blog. Start over.

The thing is, DScottGRRL is all about me. What I’m thinking. What I’m feeling. What makes me go grrrr… You know how it is when you have so many choices you just get paralyzed? Yeh. So I’m thinking I want to narrow my focus a bit.

There’s one theme I’ve kept coming back to in this blog. And even when I haven’t been writing about it, I’ve been thinking about it. It’s a huge part of me and who I am today and I really want to explore it further. It’s one of those things that you’re so close to you can’t figure out what it really. Forest for the trees and what not. All you can do is question, question, question, and, hopefully, when I start writing about it full-time, I’ll find people who can commiserate and celebrate it with me.

Because I know I’m not the only one. Not by a long shot.

You see, I come from foreign. That’s what it’s going to be all about.

18 years in Trinidad, 8 in Miami, and 1.25 in LA–I’m suffering from a serious identity crisis. Six of one, half a dozen of the other. All of nothing. Nothing at all. A lot of times, being from too many somewheres can just make you feel like you’re from nowhere.

Now that’s the negative part of it (in a nutshell).

There are positives (remember I said commiserate and celebrate)

Off the bat people think you’re this adventurous type traveling the world and experiencing new places, peoples, and cultures. And they’re right. When I’m getting down on myself, I don’t think about it that way, though. I feel like I’ve just been led on these various pathways with no real direction on my part, just going with the flow and accepting where it takes me.

When I’m feelin all up on myself, I feel proud of where I’m from and where I’ve been and maybe at the time it felt like I was just allowing someone else to make the decision to take me from A to B, but, you know, I could have said no.

Maybe I needed the push but it happened because I wanted it to happen.

I wanted to do something different. To find myself in an entirely new and strange environment (i.e. LA–Miami is a little less strange when you’re coming from a Caribbean island). I wanted it and it happened. And I’m pretty proud of that. And I’m definitely a better person for it.

An ex-friend once told me that the two best things you can spend your money on is education and travel.

Well, I’m getting my MBA so let’s just check #1 off the list.

And I’ve recently settled in my second big U.S. city/third place I call home, so I guess I’m doing okay on that front as well.

It’s a terribly conflicted perspective when you’re an insider/outsider, always somewhere betwixt and between, always feeling like you’re on the fringes.

And that’s what I want to explore.

It’s coming soon. I’ll let you guys know. In the meantime, let me know what you think!

And I definitely want all my fellow foreigners to chime in and, hopefully, contribute with guest posts whenever the mood catches you.

Thanks guys. Peace out for now.

Technorati Tags: foreigner, trinidad, los angeles, miami

Actually, I think that’s the end of my post.

The title says it all.

I’m not a superfanatic health freak, but I like to take care of myself and sweating makes me feel good.

Exercise has been a huge part of my life (off and on) for about my whole life. Ballet, swimming, tennis, step aerobics, spinning, yoga, pilates, tae bo–I’ve done it all.

The first few years after college I took a break though (yeh, work sucks) and I’m still recovering.

2007 has definitely been my best consistent exercise year since I graduated. At least four times a week for pretty much the entire year. It’s not perfect but I’m pretty proud of myself.

How did I do it?

Simple.

A single, simple, lickle phrase that keeps me in check whenever I feel like a sloth.

What Would A Fat Ass Do?

Dude, I don’t want to be a Fat Ass.

Ever.

Laziness

You know what the worst thing about Fat Asses are? (hint: not the fat)

They’re lazy.

And lazy is a cardinal sin in my book.

I guess it would be more accurate to tell myself Don’t Be A Lazy Ass but somehow it just doesn’t have the same fear-inducing impact. (Let’s Be Real)

So every morning when I wake up and I have to decide whether I’m going to work out or not, I ask myself:

What Would A Fat Ass Do?

And then I tell myself:

Dude, I Don’t Want To Be a Fat Ass.

And I get to stepping.

Everytime I’m confronted with the option of stairs or an escalator, I ask myself:

What Would A Fat Ass Do?

And then I tell myself:

Dude, Don’t Be a Fat Ass.

And I get to stepping.

Hey, it works for me.

Everytime I’m vegging on the couch and I know I have 10 million things I should be doing rather than watching soul-sucking television, I ask myself:

What Would A Fat Ass Do?

And I take a moment to think about it, I shudder at the thought, and then I get off my Fat Ass and get to stepping.

Everyone Needs A Goal

I like to know that at the end of the day, every day, I wasn’t a Fat Ass. I did stuff. I accomplished something (i.e. not being a Fat Ass).

Hey, it may not work for everyone but it works for me like a charm.

Whatever Works For You

Other people (ahem Skinny Bitch) have other ideas about what to do to stay slim and healthy.

What a crock. With a title like Skinny Bitch I sooo thought it would embrace my Don’t Be A Fat Ass philosophy.

Colour me fooled. (book review coming soon)

So, there you go, people.

I’m going home for Christmas. There’ll be tons of delicious food that I won’t have a chance to eat for, like, another year.

And while I may Eat like a Fat Ass for a weak, I won’t Do like one, and I know I’ll be OK.

Technorati Tags: fat ass, exercise, diet, skinny bitch

Love Bowling Just LURRRRVEEE EEET!

It’s always delightful when you find new sports which you should totally never again be caught playing because the next time you just might actually die of embarrassment.

I am a horrendously awful bowler.

Not that I didn’t know that before. Somewhere in there I was always remotely aware that bowling wasn’t “my thing.” But that didn’t mean I wasn’t up for a night of balls and pins.

Au contraire, I was all over that shit.

Forgetful Jones

I guess it had been a while–say, 9 months or so–since the last time I’d bowled. And within those 9 months I had magically forgotten:

a) how much I suck at bowling

b) how much I hate losing

c) the inevitability of my sucking and consequent losing at bowling

Not Last

I’ve written about my competitive streak before (here) but let me make it clear–it had no place in bowling last night.

Bowling for me was never about winning.

I mean, let’s be real–we all have a good enough idea of what we can humanly accomplish in life and for me, a 300 is not on that list and never will be.

No, I didn’t set out with pie-in-the-sky hopes of kicking ass at bowling last night. My goals were much more humble: not being last.

It’s one thing to suck and entirely another to suck the most out of everyone you’re with. And that was me, last night.

Urgghhhhh.

And I tried. I really really really tried. Sometimes I’d get close and get 9 pins but never the strike. In 4 consecutive games, not one, single strike. Lordie, not even a spare. NOT ONE SPARE.

I tried to think about it rationally. I’ve never sucked this bad before, I don’t think.

Wardrobe Issues

Maybe it was my outfit.

I had a really hard time figuring out what to wear last night.

Here were the factors: 50 degrees outside, nice dinner with friends… then bowling.

For the life of me I could not come up with the outfit to accommodate all three factors.

Pants

There’s the whole no heels things–can’t wear pants that are long enough to wear heels because then you’ll be tripping over them when you wear those gorgeous rental bowling shoes. And of course, the pants have to be comfortable to allow for freedom of movement. Same with shirt.

Layers

And then you have to think about layers. It’s effing cold outside but you know once you’re there and throwing strikes (ha ha) you’ll get all warmed up and feel the need to remove clothing.

Dinner

And then there’s the dinner factor. Who wants to look like a schlub going to play bowling when you’re going out to dinner with friends?

It was just a little too much for me. I couldn’t deal. Couldn’t wrap my head around it. I’m not saying it’s impossible. Just that I was unprepared for the occasion and well, that just never bodes well.

I blame the weather. I’m just not in a good wardrobe place when it comes to this whole winter thing. It was miserable. I was switching it up til the last minute and I just wasn’t happy about it.

Lesson Learned

I know myself. An unhappy outfit is a sucky bowling Dan.

Lesson learned.

Challenge: A prize to who comes up with the perfect bowling/dinner/50-degree weather outfit. I’ll be the judge

Technorati Tags: bowling, LA, winter, wardrobe issues

Ok so I don’t have my plan yet, but I will. And maybe it will be six months, maybe it will be longer. I just have to figure out something, man.

I’ve been simulating forward motion by starting my MBA and I thought that would suffice for the next 2 to 3 years it will take me to graduate.

Nope. Sorry, not cutting it.

Goals are king.

And I need some.

I don’t like to think of myself as Type A even though I know I exhibit some of the qualities from time to time. On the one hand, I’m quite busy–busier than I’ve been for over a year, so I really should just shut it and enjoy my life. Which I am. I love my life. It’s a sweet, charmed life and I’m incredibly grateful.

But I want more.

Bigger, better, faster, more.

At least something!

What’s life without goals? If you’re not working towards something you might as well just die because seriously, what is the point?

So I need something.

Maybe I just need to start writing regularly again and getting out of my head. A mind is a dangerous thing, after all. Overthink and what not.

I don’t know yet. But I’mma think about it reaaaaaallly hard. And maybe I’ll even put a thing or two into motion.

We’ll seee. There are a couple things brewing.

Technorati Tags: overthink, goals, type a, mba

I’ve heard People say numerous times that society requires of us that we face the door while in an elevator. Even when we’re riding alone.

It’s one of the things People cite as a social norm that helps make the world run a little bit smoother.

Well I guess I was put on this earth to cause a ruckus because I neeeeevvver face the door.

Everrrrrr.

If it’s crowded, I’ll face one side with my back against the wall, closest as I can be to the door.

Two reasons:

a) I don’t like people staring at the back of my head (that’s just weird. seriously)

b) If it’s crowded, I want to be the closest to the door as possible so I can make a run for it. Even if I’m the last stop.

That’s not so illogical is it?

Of course, when I’m alone in an elevator I feel compelled to walk around in concentric circles, quietly hoping to God no one gets in and catches me, but nevertheless entirely unable to control the impulse.

There is one reason for this:

I can’t stand still. Ever. For like, more than two seconds.

So does that make me a social freak or are People just wrong?

I’ll believe the latter until someone presents me with overwhelming evidence to the contrary. And when they do, I’ll just take that evidence and rationalize the shit out of it until it submits to my way of thinking.

I’m the queen of this universe.

‘Tis good to be the queen.

I used to like phones.

I was a typical teenager.

For my 15th birthday my cake was a phone. Every time the phone rang, Julius the parrot would say, “Danielle, come!”

So WTF happened?

Nowadays, a ringing phone sends a jolt through my heart, my arhythmia kicks in, paralysis strikes, no no no…

No time to prepare.

What do they want?

Too many unknowns.

The inevitable small talk. what to say. jot it down. write a script. oh god. Read the rest of this entry »

This is James Mally, N.D. performing ear candling on a patient.
http://www.abundanthealth.com/art-ec.html

Life is full of so many minor amusements that tend to delight.

I love the little things.

Most of the time I don’t share what they are with others. Frankly, I don’t think many people are as comfortable with their quirks as I am. That’s not to say they don’t have them.

Here are couple things that I’ve been in remiss in posting about but have given me great joy in the past few weeks:

1. So after two years of intermittent discussion, we finally bought ear candles. Not that the actual ear candling experience was that great. And from all accounts and our own powers of observation it was much ado about nothing. I couldn’t really tell you that my aura felt any cleaner. But now, I’ve done it, I can say I’ve done it, and I have an extra pair handy if the need ever arises. I luuuurve being prepared for the unexpected.

Read the rest of this entry »

Day infinite of dreariness.

Thank God I’ll be home tomorrow

They say the marine layer’s going to burn off sometime today…

What do you think?

The tiniest hint of blue to tease my weary, sun-starved soul.

Now I must admit, fog beats smog any day and that’s only one of the multitudinous reasons why I won’t move from the westside.

But seriously, it’s time for me to do my part in dispelling this “sunny-California-beachin’-every-day myth.”

Now let this be a lesson to you all.

Firstly, the water ain’t that pretty and unless you’re a masochist or surfer you will never venture into that ice bucket. You won’t find me there fo sho.

And secondly (this is the clincher), by some perverse California anti-logic, the closer you get to the water, the nastier the weather gets. Here’s my irrefutable proof:

Read the rest of this entry »